Thursday, December 08, 2005

To survive the brutal Texas winter, you need balls and clits of steel

My wife didn't have to go work today because it was on the cold side, twentyish some degrees. No ice. My dad just called me up to tell me it was 20 degrees below zero in western Nebraska. Did they call off his work? No. Did he and his fellow Nebraskans mob the grocery stores? Nay. He, like many other mighty Nebraska warriors, soldiered on. Then, he drove 40 miles to go Christmas shopping. Apparently, everything is bigger in Texas except the ability to adapt to a few days of cold. Ice, I can understand. We don't have the equipment, and most people don't have the experience, to deal with icy roads here. But all you need to do is put on a coat and take off your diaper. There is no need for the university to shut down. It's nonsense. However, if I wasn't such an unemployable failure, I would applaud this cowardice for it would mean a paid day off.

"If that's cowardice, then coward me up." --- Spoken by an alternate Dr. Mystery, one who has job security and is not hemorrhaging money by the barrelful, in a beautiful dream. Good lord, I'm fucked. The temp agency can't even find me any work. When I quit my next job, and I undoubtedly will, I will wait until I am employed elsewhere before jumping ship. Still, a year with no job is something to behold. I soared with the eagles, lived as an eagle, became an eagle. Now, eagle time is over. I must get a job in January or I will be as dry as a bone. My reserves have been siphoned. I am not an eagle. I am just a man.

2 comments:

Bartleby said...

Not an eagle? Not an eagle? These are not the words of robot x. These are not the words of the man who ate dozens--nay, hundreds--of tasty sandwiches. When others pussed out and said, "yes, let me trudge on through my easy but tedious job, slowly allowing every bit of my dignity and humanity to be ground away" robot x said, "give me some more motherfucking sandwiches. And the best 100 movies of 1983." Not an eagle? Fuck that noise.

Dr. Mystery said...

Alright. Maybe I am an eagle.