Friday, October 15, 2004

Bill O'Reilly is an idiot

Now that you've read all about Bill O'Reilly's penchant for phone sex and hot, steamy shower loofahs on www.thesmokinggun.com, it's time to read his first novel, Those Who Trespass, about a series of murders of high-profile network executives. No one can crack the case until a tough New York cop who plays by his own rules named Tommy O'Malley steps into the picture. Hmm, I wonder if there are any parallels here? O'Reilly. O'Malley. O'Reilly. O'Malley. O'Reilly. O'Malley. Wow. That's really subtle, but if you look for it, the parallels are there. O'Reilly is truly a modern-day Renaissance man. In just a little more than a decade, he's conquered tabloid television, network news, radio, literature, shouting, interrupting, sexual harrassment, and our hearts, and I hear he's almost able to suck his own dick. He's set a November 1 deadline, and I, for one, believe he'll reach that goal. Bill, you're truly the living end. I leave you now with a user comment from Amazon.com about O'Reilly's novel and its book-on-tape counterpart:

"The audio version is recommended for the graphic oral sex descriptions, narrated with gusto and verve by the author."

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