Sunday, April 29, 2007

Someone vented some spleen at me


After four years writing this goofy blog, "the home of the bizarre rant" according to KFART radio's "Crazy" Doug Bonercock, I finally got my first hate comment. Someone really, really hates me. The odd thing is, they just left the comment this morning for a post I wrote two years ago that is pretty mild. I'm not going to link to the old post because I find it embarrassingly badly written (my post, not his/her hate-filled comment, which I find beautiful), but it was spurred by seeing parts of "Viva Les Amis," a documentary about a beloved Austin institution that closed down and was replaced by a Starbucks. Everyone in the documentary went on and on about how Austin was great in 1990 and how much it sucks now. My post was about how tired I was of hearing certain people in Austin constantly pine for the good ol' days, talk about how everything was so much better then, remain stuck in the nostalgic rose-tinted inaccurate past while being a bitter whiner about the present. Things change, youth fades, grow up, stop whining, the Alamo Drafthouse theaters weren't here 12 years ago and they're pretty great, etc., you get the gist of it. Not one of my better posts, but it angered someone so much he/she left me this comment:

"Please return yourself and everyone you know back to wherever you came. You suck you fucking douchebag."

Nice. I am confused about one thing, though. On returning myself and everyone I know back to wherever I came. I came to Austin, so I can't really return to it. That's kind of a "back to the future" dilemma, isn't it? I assume you mean "came from," but come on man or lady, if you're going to hate with power, you also have to hate with accuracy. I look forward to continuing our discussion over waffles sometime in the future, anonymous pussy.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Please return yourself and everyone you know back to wherever you came. You suck you fucking douchebag."

Sincerely,

Matt McConaughey

carrie said...

i can't believe you like waffles. you really do suck.

Angela said...

I would just like to say that I'm looking forward to returning to wherever you came. Let's have beers!

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, anonymous guy DOES have a point. Pehaps I'll take his side. Then again, your blog IS named "Can-smashing robot" which is very, very cool. Hmm. Who to side with? This is tough. Of course, Anonymous has written so many great poems and stuff - they kinda beat your blog. I'm leaning his/her way on this - but, GOD, I don't know if I can go against a real live can-smashing robot. what could be cooler than that? Maybe a can-smashing robot that shot fire or something. Or chewed up anonymous poems and spit them out in pellets like some kind of a future owl! oh yeah, that would be SWEET.
well, looks like he/she is claiming to be more from Texas than you - and I sure do hate Texass. I mess with it whenever I can. So, in that spirit I say "fooey" to the complaints of anonymous and I officially endorse the robot. Please let me know when you start shooting fire - or, perhaps, when TX creates some politicians who aren't psychopatic morons. We here in the non-texas states would surelty appreciate it.