Please enjoy this completely unrelated photo of President Taft before
you read this blog post, compliments of the creative team behind Mr.
Krauter, the half-robot, half-hologram, all-hunk who was programmed to
write this crap.
Wowzers. Haven't updated this thing in a
while. Need to put all the shit in my life that's out of whack back in
whack, blow the dust off the neglected parts and give them some sweet,
sweet attention, and stop wasting time like I did on Sunday arguing
about politics with my relatives on Facebook. Is there anything worse
than arguing on Facebook? I don't even give a shit about politics. I
only give a shit about art and sandwiches. I lose respect for myself
every time I get ensnared in that bullshit. I used to get ensnared in it
a lot, because my relatives write and forward a lot of crazy shit and I
stay up late and enjoy the occasional drink and the combination of all
that stuff became deadly. Now I either hide the posts or ignore them,
and I feel a lot better about myself. But, Sunday, man. They were
dogpiling on my mom like bullies and making a lot of generalizations about a large, disparate demographic, and that pisses me
off. I jumped in, things got heated, and crazy, crazy things were typed
by almost all. It's impossible to write an eloquent sentence in the
Facebook argument. Everyone ends up looking like the world's biggest
jackass. No one came out of that online battle royale looking like a
champion. I can be a real loser sometimes. I'm pretty disgusted with
myself for wasting my time on it. Still don't get what happened to my relatives. They
went through the neocon meatgrinder and came out the other side in a
shiny Limbaugh/Hannity/O'Reilly sausage casing. Facebook-forwarding
footsoldiers in the dissemination-of-bullshit army. Best to just keep on
keeping three or four states in between us and remember the past is
dead. We had some good times in the pre-Facebook days, before the pod
people bodysnatched them. We're not any good for each other in the
present.
The idea of family is something that troubles me. I used to
think I had a handle on what it meant, but now I feel like I was in a
balloon that popped. Every member of my immediate family lives in a
different city or town in four different states, I can't relate to my uncles and cousins anymore, all the cool old folks died, my parents
split up and made some very bad post-divorce relationship decisions I don't support, and I
have my own life here with my wife and wacky cats and rock band and
unfulfilling day job and mild depression and impending middle age and
list of regrets. My life is statistically half over, and I haven't
figured out a damn thing about how I can be useful to myself or others.
And that's the weird place I'm at tonight.
Postscript: I posted this last night, felt weird about posting it, and then deleted it, then felt weird about deleting it, so here it is again, with some changes. Nobody even reads this shit anyway, so why censor myself?
1 comment:
(i read it! and feel weirdly disconnected from my own family lately. we had a good thing going when there were four of us, but now that there are three, shit's all fucked up.)
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