Tuesday, September 05, 2006

September caption contest















Hello friends! Quick rule recap: Leave a caption in comment form under post! Be automatically entered in drawing! Winner receives mix CD created by me! Last month's winner ineligible! Don't cry, last month's winner! You can play again next month! Stay away from the barbed tail of a stingray!

14 comments:

Cloudhurler said...

"Do I want fries with that?" No, not really.

joel said...

it is always a good idea to don a helmet before eating anything bigger than your head. or at least that's what my mom always says.

kristykay said...

Henry mistakenly believed that eating comicly large food items would help his head grow into proportion with the rest of his body.

Bartleby said...

While many wished Clarence's head was as big as his heart, others knew that it was, in fact, the size of an unimaginably disgusting cheeseburger.

milk and cake said...

i think i can, i think i can, i think i can...

oh shit. no i can't.

Krouchdog said...

"The helmet? Oh, that's for when I shit this out. I won't go into details though."

steiger said...

The future of competitive eating: size over quantity. In collegiate team competition, players are scored on overall mass of food consumed, relative comestibility of food item, speed, execution and composure.

Here, Henry of the Georgia Tech Yellow Dogs demonstrates the underhand dispatch technique with a lumberjack-sized cheeseburger. This technique has proven highly effective with sandwiches in the five pound or greater category.

Also note that Henry has chosen to balance the pickle chips on top of the burger, a signature flourish that never fails to earn him points in both execution and comestibility.

Anonymous said...

"No, ma'am, I know that Michael is only seven years old, but there is no way that rBGH has anything to do with his... above average physical development."

:junebug

Julia said...

He'll never get a bite that yields an accurate cross section.

thepantsthatibuilt said...

Mayor McCheese won't be pleased about this...

casual ninja said...

the competitive eating circuit and the special olympics fought violently over first draft pick, reginald.

Air Wolf said...

And Mrs. Huxtable awoke. She now knew she must never, never let her husband eat his meatball hoagie.

conorj said...

With stocks plummeting, and Fast Food Nation crumbling, the CEO's join forces and decide, "aw, fuck it...let's just take out those few, proud, and barely-standing loyalists--y'know, for old times sake." We bring you: The Infarctor, served with a side of Anginamite Sticks, and a soda so f-ing big that the diabetes will commence somewhere between the start and finish of that icy-cold vat.

conorj2 said...

Hot off the presses: Against the wishes of his fiance, Morgan Spurlock has just began developing a new project named INFARCT ME!, which will explore just how many Infarctor Value Meals it takes to send him into cardiac arrest. Spurlock figures this expose film will surely bring him the Oscar he was cheated out of a few years ago. But little does Spurlock know, while Michael Moore was filming his newest political doc I REALLY FUCKING HATE BUSH, REALLY REALLY REALLY FUCKING HATE HIM, someone left the cameras rolling during his lunch break and the footage should hit theatres sometime around Christmas.